Pilot Episode

(Awkward silence....)

Sooooo, it's really hard to start a new blog post after a 6-month absence. It's like running into an old friend that you don't really like in the supermarket. "Oh HEY! How ARE you?" as if yelling a few keywords will be the equivalent of actually giving a shit. Then the person with the guiltier conscience feels like they have to give an excuse as to why they let 6 months pass without any contact. So, here we go:

I hated my job. It was ruining my life. I had panic attacks that rendered me physically immobile. Family and friends told me that I had become a horrible person that they didn't enjoy spending time with. If I had blogged at all, it probably would have gone something like this: "GAH! FUCK EVERYONE!" Then I went on a mission trip with a church group to Biloxi, MS and felt the joy of the Lord in my heart, my soul, my bod. I loved my neighbor as myself, I got the joy of the Lord! (Seriously? Yes.) So then I came back and called my boss at 9am on Monday morning and told her I'd be giving my notice, to which she replied, "Very Good. Thanks." (Seriously? Yes.)

So now I'm unemployed and to spice things up even more, Hup and I moved into the house right next door to my parents' house. Everyday I wake up not knowing where I am or where I'm going. (Answer: Nowhere, apparantly.) The epitomy of my new lifestyle came on Tuesday morning when my mom called me and said, "Since you're at home and unemployed, I've got a chicken in the fridge that needs to be cooked. I'd offer you and Hup some, but there's only enough for me and dad." Sure, no problem. I wasn't doing anything anyway, except waiting for Verizon to install my digital cable and DVR. We had basic cable that must have been leftover from the previous tenants, which Hup said was like watching TV Russian-Roulette style. What did we ever do before the Guide button? Settle for The Price is Right because we didn't even know that Magnum PI was on? What a waste!